夏日香氣

自分らしさを失う

私は、自分を見失うことに慣れている

同情されたくない
見知らぬ街を歩いた
人込みは
私の耐え難い切なさをちょっと隠してくれた

あなたが追いかけてくれるかどうかを知りたいから
誰も来てくれないとわかっていたのに
それでも意地を張って、私は
自分を失うことにこだわった

すべての理由は一つだけ
私は、あなたをもう愛してしまっていたから。


Getting Myself Lost

I'm used to losing myself.

Knowing that you just felt sorry for me,
I walked to an unfamiliar street.
The busy crowd
Concealed the intolerable cruelty properly.

Wondering if you'd run after me,
Knowing that no one would come,
I still insisted on getting myself lost
By all means.

It's all because
I was used to loving you.

-------------------
The following is mowen's version. mowen: http://lang-8.com/576467

Losing oneself

I'm used to losing myself.
Knowing your false sympathy
I walk down unfriendly streets.
Among nameless faces
Hiding nameless fears
Wondering if you'll come running
Knowing you won't come.
I still get used to losing myself
Because
I got used to loving you.

弄丟自己

我習慣把自己弄丟

因為不想被同情
我走到一個陌生的大街
來往的人群
正好掩飾了自己的難堪

因為想知道你會不會追上來
明明知道誰也不會來
但我還是執意要
把自己弄丟

因為
我已經習慣了愛你

Losing oneself

I'm used to losing myself.
Knowing your false sympathy
I walk down unfriendly streets.
Among nameless faces
Hiding nameless fears
Wondering if you'll come running
Knowing you won't come.
I still get used to losing myself
Because
I got used to loving you.

from Mervyn mowen